I just read an amazing article from the Huffington post
It hits home today for sure. Sometimes, I dread going to the store. Once upon a time, I had a cooperative, smiley kid. He did so well going to the store, because we had been going to the store since he was teeny-tiny. Now, I have a toddler who screams when he has to go in a cart and then licks the handle of said cart *huge sigh*.
Like most moms (I assume) people tell me how cute gabe is and like the article, to enjoy it because it goes so fast. They are right. I cannot believe that in a month I will be the mother of a two year old. Wasn't I just pregnant?! But, like almost everyone, parent or not, I do not enjoy every moment. I sometimes want to pull my hair out, to just stick gabe in front of the tv so I can have a moment. There are also those days when I realize that I'm not really interacting with him.
Then, the guilt sets in. Jorge, or anyone really, will make some kind of comment about only being this age once. And while I appreciate that fact, sometimes it's just hard. When gabe is throwing a tantrum because he just wants to lick the cream cheese off a bagel instead of eating the bagel, it's hard to appreciate that now, he is seconds older than he was. He is growing up quickly before my eyes.
I may not have kairos moments everyday. I may not enjoy every minute of every day, but I don't think many people do. I go to bed happy, cuddled together with the two men in my life. Maybe I don't want gabe in my bed every night, but he's going to be there. Maybe it's annoying, but it's also adorable and makes my heart melt when he grabs my face and cuddles into it. I think as long as you realize there are moments in our lives that we will never get back, and to appreciate them, there is little more to ask for. If I blog, or put a photo on instagram or Facebook, I'm acknowledging that I love my son and I'm enjoying every moment as best that I can.
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